Loop-De-Loop

That's what's happening inside my head - a freaking loop-de-loop!!!

There's lots going on over here. It's been an exhaustive week.

Despite the fact that I have 9 zillion things going on and 15 zillion things to do...I cannot stop thinking about this freaking TWO WEEK WAIT (2ww)!!!!

Am I pregnant? Could I actually be pregnant? What if I am pregnant? Wait. It's entirely possibly and perfectly reasonable to believe that I'm not pregnant. In fact, I'm more likely NOT pregnant than I am actually pregnant. Scientifically n'at!

I try to be realistic and not get my hopes up. I'm not always very good at this. Positive thinking is not my strong point! Nor is it Franks!

It's been one week & one day since I gave myself the "trigger" shot (the meds that will make me ovulate, thus actually giving us a chance to conceive). This shot produces the pregnancy hormone, HCG, which will force my body to ovulate. HCG is also the hormone that your body produces when you're pregnant. SO, giving myself this shot means my body not only ovulates, but also thinks it's pregnant. This means that when I took a pregnancy test the day after administering the shot, I got a positive test. I actually did this on purpose. I just wanted to see it! Hey, positive thinking, right? A positive visualization! I know it's silly, but I couldn't resist!

From what I understand, the shot will be out of my system in 7-10 days,. I think I'll take another test tomorrow, which will be 9 days past "trigger". If the test comes out negative, then I know the HCG shot is out of my system. This ensures I'll have a real result when I test for pregnancy in one week.

Who knew trying to get pregnant was this difficult!? I've said it before, and I'll say it again - I want my money back for all the birth control pills, spermicides, contraceptive films and condoms I paid for!!!

Anyhow, there are a couple other really shitty things going on in our world right now. I'm really trying to keep busy & stay positive. It's not really working, but I'm certainly trying!

Hopefully I'll be updating the blogging world w/ awesome news next week. Of course, the whole idea of that just starts the loop-de-loop of freak outs all over again!